Yesterday we celebrated four months of forever with Laila. On 9/22 this little baby girl toddled into the room at the civil affairs office in Nanning and proceeded to show us how unwilling she was to be friends!! She grieved SO hard in those first few weeks in China. And while I knew that it would get better, I'd be lying if I didn't say it was still difficult. Very difficult.
This little daughter of ours was so much like a one year old baby in spite of her chronological age of 3 1/2 years old. She didn't feed herself. She didn't dress herself. She could barely walk. She certainly couldn't run or jump. She didn't talk. She'd spent her whole life so far struggling to survive. We knew we had a long road ahead of us with this little girl.
Once we got home, she started feeling more secure. She started trying to feed herself bites of her food. She started sitting in her own seat at the table rather than on Mommy or Daddy's laps as she was spoon fed part of our dinner. And she made great physical progress, learning to walk steadily and even run as she chased after that new big brother and big sister!!
And now here we are with four whole months of forever in the books...
She is now talking!! Yes, talking!!! And not just one word here or there, but actual short sentences.
"Let me see." "Give me that." "Mommy I hungry." "I want water." "Baby needs go sleepy." and my favorite one of all..
"I wan go go home."
She knows where her home is and cheers every single day when we pull back into the driveway after daycare!
She can undress herself & get dressed again all by herself!! (though admittedly, buttons are still a wee bit tricky;)
She can undress herself & get dressed again all by herself!! (though admittedly, buttons are still a wee bit tricky;)
She's also jumping! And climbing! She can climb up the rock wall of the playground outside all by herself!!
She's almost completely potty trained! We've had many days with no accidents all day long! :)
She's getting all the medical care she needs. Her transfusions are giving her energy she has never had before!! And all that great blood & good nutrition has caused another amazing thing...
She's growing!! Over 2 inches in her first 3 months home!!
This adorable girl is very quickly progressing in so many ways!!
I'll be honest though... It's been tough. Parenting a toddler is tricky already, but parenting a toddler with food issues, security issues, and developmental delays is even harder and more stressful than it was for a bio kid. There are times when she screams and screams and screams and screams in ways that are beyond normal toddler tantrums.
Daycare transition was extremely difficult and so many times I felt like a horrible mother, leaving her there when I could hear her screams outside of the building. I praise God everyday that she's gained the confidence and security to know now that "Mama always comes back."
And I still feel a little heartbroken when I see a "real" 3-4 year old walking around talking to their mama in Target and look at my sweet girl who has SO MUCH catching up to do.
But she IS making huge strides!! Strides that are celebrated by every member of our family!!
Adoption is a beautiful thing to live. We get to witness big & small miracles every day with this girl. We get to see her learn to trust, learn to share, learn to listen to rules, learn to calm herself down, learn to accept love from siblings, and witness "first" after "first".
She is a little miracle and we love her so much!!
Once again, thank you to so many people who helped get Laila home!!! We love you all and are forever grateful that you said "yes" to helping this sweet girl come home. :)
Thanks for stopping by,
Fannie, Matt, Kate, Chengbin, & Miss Laila
I loved this post, it had both real hardships and real joys, something I know will be happening for us soon. We have three bio boys and are adopting our daughter from China. She is currently 2.5 (she will be just 3 around the time we travel) and is developmentally delayed. She is walking but not talking, dressing nor feeding herself. Thank you for your blog posts, it helps to know someone who is down this road!! :)
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